I’m downtown today on a sunny Sunday sitting in air-conditioned comfort in this lifeless office. I love to work, and I have a tendency to love to work a lot.

Lately I have been spending more time perusing job ads, looking for a position within my current skill set, that doesn’t push my capabilities, nor require intense study. Every position I’ve ever had, bar serving coffee at the YMCA in Toronto, has required hauling out the method books; required a frenetic pace of study to just keep up or lead.

I see others spending their weekends working in their back-yard, tending their gardens, going off to unbeknownst to me events, and generally enjoying some down time. I’d love to spend the day on a bike ride with Camren, or go for a hike in the woods somewhere.

This 7 day a week push was supposed to be temporary. A pandemic thing (what else was there to do but work) and not a lifestyle. We aren’t attempting to cure cancer or solve big problems, nor are we trying to make a lot of money, and yet here I am.

When you reach middle age are you not supposed to slow down? I’m doing the opposite, longer work hours, harder work outs – work outs I compare to going to war. Neither are producing great results.

Maybe it’s time for a period of self-reflection, a re-examing of priorities and goals. Except, I’m not sure how I’ll find the time.