Yearly Archives: 2022

Update on A Quick Change

January felt like a tough month and in an effort to ensure some control over my life and keep moving forward, I proposed a few bullets of change.

As with many of the bullet lists I create, I didn’t get through it all, partially due to laziness and also in no small part due to contracting COVID.

My biggest disappointment is certainly my inability to ramp up my physical activity (thank you lungs) and the ever increasing middle aged paunch. The greatest gift that returning to the Island has given is 20lbs of weight gain.

The healthy diet we had in Taiwan is just a little bit harder to replicate here and the bread just a little bit more abundant and tasty.

Dreams of running an ultra without excessive injury are drifting away.

What I have accomplished is reading, and though not on the list writing. I’ve managed to read 8 books since the 15th of January and average 2-3 short stories a week. For many I know, my daughter included, this isn’t cause for celebration, but based on my previous habits, it’s a good start.

Now that I seem to be rid of all effects of COVID, and it’s still a big PITA for the vaccinated and healthy, I hope I can slowly spend more time on physical activity with perhaps a race in the fall.

Help still required

It’s that time again, time to update my payment information across multiple systems. Luckily this only happens once every four years or so, as this interaction illustrates why companies still need to hire someone people with an eye for detail and a ounce of empathy for their customers.

Kudos to PayPal who somewhat uncomfortably updates this info automatically.

Unfortunately, Pair Networks has no area to update your payment details in their VPS account that I could find, unlike their shared hosting which has a completely different UI. Parent company Libsyn, hides billing information in a different place for their Enterprise accounts. Public Mobile uses tiny text as an afterthought and their database is so slow you need to wait 2 minutes for each screen change. And the list goes on …

Every time I think there must be so many accepted UI patterns that work, that there must be no more work for those people concerned with their customers experience, I come across situations like this.

I’ve allocated a couple of hours for this. I hope it will be enough.

Like a fine wine

I can think of no better analogy to describe the cup of coffee I had at The Shed on Monday. After a weekend of drinking coffee from the likes of The Java Moose and The Second Cup it was particularly refreshing to taste coffee’s true potential.

See you again St. John

This past weekend found us in St. John, NB, a city I don’t think I have ever visited but may have driven to when I would have been too young to realize where I was.

We were there for Camrens swimming meet, his first off-Island meet and the largest since COVID turned kids lives upside down.

The uptown is full of wonderful architecture with intricate detail and I loved the sturdy old brick homes. At the same time there was a certain edge to the place, which might be due to it’s current and past industrial activities, but also the poverty that was evident for all to see. The uptown suffers from the same fate as Charlottetown, as it’s extremely quiet, with few locals about, as most prefer to live in the outer edges and shop and eat at the soulless big box stores. It’s a shame that it is only tourists who appreciate an interesting downtown.

St. John is home to not only Crosby Molasses, but also a couple fine coffee roasters, which I will get to brew over the coming week. Drinking copious amounts of coffee there re-affirms to me just how lucky we are to have The Shed. There is no comparison.

We are looking forward to going back to St. John in the first week of May for Canada Games trials, and we’ve already booked an AirBnB for that period. The hotel’s in Saint John look like they haven’t had much in the way of investment for 20 years, and at least in the place we stayed, it shows.

1,000,000

We passed a particular milestone recently as we reached 1,000,000 downloads over a 30 day period with Sleep Tight Stories.

Downloads as a metric of success are fraught with inadequacies; I could like others, shorten our episodes and publish every day of the week, and our downloads would certainly go up. Rankings on Apple Podcasts are somewhat the same, though supposedly more qualitative, they are but one measurement.

If you asked me how to create a podcast and get to even greater reach than ours I could tell you. If you asked me how we did it, I couldn’t, because we haven’t really done much of anything, other than to consistently create and improve our audio over a long period of time. My wife and are very “quiet”, so much so that you might think that we have a “we don’t talk about podcasting” rule ala fight club. Other than 2 cheap ads on Overcast we haven’t advertised, haven’t done any cross promotion, collabs, or been featured in any publications whatsoever. I seldom talk to other podcasters, nor do I network. And we live on PEI, which is not what you would call a hotbed of children’s entertainment, or a hotbed of anything really.

This is all a fault, and yet here we are.

We are not particularly ambitious. I like creating audio that kids enjoy, and that helps kids relax and get a good nights rest. And now that much of our current material is written by myself, I can tailor our stories specifically to their needs and interests. We aren’t setting ourselves up for a sale, or to join Amazon or iHeart, or be an “exclusive” Spotify podcast (they don’t advertise to kids anyway, so we wouldn’t be attractive to them), we just hope to continue making something meaningful to ourselves and our audience.

So, here’s to reaching 2,000,000 per month.

Commute view

Sheryl spent a few days in Truro this week which meant I was without a car, so I took the opportunity to run to and from my office in the downtown. It’s not really that long a walk either.

Madness

The Aston Origin has been a part of the sound of our podcasts and voice over for almost 2 years. It’s a condenser microphone and has all the advantages and disadvantages that most apparently have.

I can’t remember the exact reasoning for selecting this brand, but I’m sure reviews, price and the mic’s aesthetic had something to do with it.

While it sounds fine, I’ve always struggled with it’s idiosyncrasies – it’s sensitive and as such picks up every little crackle and pop, mouth clicks and environmental noise present. This makes the environment we record in critical and sometimes editing a pain.

In terms of sound, I’ve always found that the mic is missing a certain clarity or openness in the mid-upper range. Something I have heard from others, and something I haven’t been able to add in production.

Aston has had a couple sales of late and when they were selling at a significant discount at Long and McQuade I jumped at the chance at purchasing the Aston Stealth to see if a “broadcast quality” dynamic microphone might make for a noticeable improvement and perhaps alleviate some of the issues we have with the Origin.

It’s different, not better. I’ve been struggling for hours listening to my voice and Sheryl’s speaking into the mic. I’ve produced finished work and I’ve listened to raw recordings. I cannot discern a noticeable improvement, and the back and forth is driving me to madness.

I’m hoping they will take it back.

A New Place

I dropped into The 5th Wave this morning as I was determined to spend time drinking coffee amongst the backdrop of people and their chatter after being stuck inside for so long. My first stop was The Shed but I swear it has been closed more often than open whenever I have dropped by this winter.

The 5th Wave has the advantage of a convenient location and an interior set-up conductive to staying for longish periods that make for a pleasant experience. It’s bright and geared towards a younger clientele; more Japanese minimalist than College bookstore. The music in the shop is front and centre, which is almost always a mistake, as it was at The Shed, and many other places who don’t think of audio as an integral part of their experience.

Yesterday when spending time at The Shed I remarked that their drip coffee tasted better than my pour over. It was quite good, and their pour over is even better. Buying black drip or pour over defines to me the character of a coffee shop. That’s what I ordered today at The 5th Wave. Their drip is a med-dark roast with a flavour profile not unlike many other slightly upscale coffee shops like Receivers. It wasn’t distinctive or great, but it was fine. They don’t do their own roasting and much of the flavour of coffee is dependent on freshness, so they are perhaps at a disadvantage in developing a uniquely flavoured product.

I’ll come back for an expresso again in the near future, and would certainly prefer spending time in their bright environment than say the darkness of the Victoria Row Receivers or Alambé Coffee.

Returning to normalcy

It’s wonderful to be out of isolation and able to move about. It’s especially great to be able to sit and enjoy a cup of coffee; coffee shops being the only place in Charlottetown in winter where you can actually be around people (I don’t do bars and there are no co-working hubs).

I delayed going back to CrossFit as we tend to be in close contact with others no matter how stringent we follow public health guidelines.

Whether my symptoms were a result of COVID or simply a chest cold, or whether there is a difference I won’t know. The medical system can no longer test people let alone give people a detailed diagnosis.

What I do know is that it’s been close to 2 weeks since onset of symptoms, 10 days since I had my positive result, and I still don’t feel anywhere close to 100%. I would never expect that my lifestyle would make for a teflon armour against illness, but I am surprised at how long it is taking me to bounce back.

Today the sun is shining and coffee tastes and smells like coffee again, so life feels good.

COVID Files

We are nearing the end of our required isolation period. I have gone outside each day – yesterday for a walk, and later a short run. The day before I went out and pushed some wet snow around. Fresh air and exercise is a decent antidote to many things.

Sheryl is still largely asymptomatic but with enough cold symptoms that it is affecting her voice, which is problematic when we have voice over work to do. Her experience shows that rapid tests are fallible. She has been asymptomatic all along, tested negative each and everyday, but when getting a pcr test, had a positive result.

Camren is back to normal and is competing in the open tonight, and has a swim meet on Sunday. Catriona is still testing negative, likely because she spends all her time in her room.

I still have a chest cold which I had before I first tested negative and later tested positive. Because of the constant coughing, sleep hasn’t been possible this week, which has an effect on my mood, and my ability to do the things I want to do. I often wondered if those who refuse to follow public health guidelines never get sick or perhaps don’t care about not accomplishing much if they do. I can’t stand putting plans on hold while my body recovers.

One symptom which is disconcerting, is that all the coffee I have been drinking this week tastes vaguely like vomit. This after just ordering a box of coffee from a roaster in Truro (of all places). I’m hoping this is temporary.

Brain fog

I’m sitting here trying to write a children’s story and a short missive about our listener growth but am incapable of stringing sentences together in a coherent manner. I’m experiencing total and complete brain fog.

Camren was the first to test positive for COVID and is back at school today. Sheryl and I both tested positive later, and are both isolating until the weekend. Catriona is enjoying her alone time and ordering food via Door Dash. Camren suffered from sore throat and headaches, and I have a cough from hell, which has meant no sleep. Sheryl is asymptomatic.

Life is grand.

Decline

I couldn’t find my wallet yesterday, usually it’s my keys, or some other item necessary for interfacing with modern society, like a mask. In winter I wear much the same, day in and day out, and the slight deviation yesterday sent me for a loop. I left my wallet in a hidden pocket I forgot about.

It’s common to joke when you reach middle age about early onset of dementia, except it’s no joke. As you get older you might settle into a routine, or you get busy, stressed, or all of these things. Throw in what has now become banal, the pandemic and the misguided protests against public health, and I guess I could be forgiven for being absent minded. But I can’t help but think that my life has been considerably dumbed down.

Living in fast paced cities where everyday presented some challenge, constantly needing to study a hard language, using that language daily, the stresses of work and communicating with people, intense exercise and an international travel habit that entailed no planning whatsoever made for a more nimble mind.

There are few such challenges these days. Life here is pretty sedate, with the pandemic even more so.

The only answer I have to this, is to try and find something new that I curious about, but have little experience with, and try to gain some expertise. I’m just not sure what that will be yet.

Story Writing

There are a number of opportunities for growth when working for yourself, a lot of goals to accomplish, a decent breadth of tasks to finish. I’ve ticked many boxes these past couple of years but there were still a few things I wanted to try before making any decisions on the future of our work. One was music composition, and the other was story writing, which I wrote about in October.

Writing children’s stories has been a slow process, and though I have been writing scripts, rewriting dated and often violent fairy tales consistently, original writing was rife with procrastination. So inefficient was my writing that despite finishing a number of stories, I decided that it wasn’t going to be viable over the long term.

Except that I started to receive reviews and email’s about the stories I wrote. Kids started asking when the next chapter was coming and this morning I received a couple email, one stating that their kids were hooked on one story, and hoping there would be another very soon, and another whose son felt “understood, less alone, validated, and comforted” after listening to one of my stories.

I’m a bit overwhelmed.

I’m not a writer, but there seems to be a greater opportunity to connect with children via podcasts than I had really considered before. It would seem it’s worth finding a way to get over this procrastination issue, take time to improve the craft, and … get an editor.

Disagreements

Disagreements and differences of opinion are part of what makes a place vibrant, interesting and at times annoying.

You like tea, and think coffee tastes like shit. I love coffee and think tea tastes like pee. But we both can agree that sitting together drinking our favourite beverage leads to some interesting conversations.

But how do you discuss an issue with someone when their opinion has been formed based on complete fabrications? Fabrications from sources they trust. And they believe that your sources are complete garbage.

In business, decisions aren’t always based on good research, data, or any research at all. Sometimes good design loses over another approach. The results can be a loss of money, maybe a lot, or maybe nothing happens at all. In the public sphere that could mean a loss of life.

There will always be complete assholes of course, but how do you bridge this gap when the issues are important?

What am I? And do I care?

My son asked me last night what a graphic designer does, and I gave him the standard definition that floats around visual communication and the mediums in which they generally work.

He then asked me if this is what I do or what I call myself.

I said no, though it once was close to what I once did (my concentration in grad school was also visual communication) but it’s not a title that I would have or would use now. I left it at that because I didn’t really know what else to say. He knows what I do, but I guess as part of this foolish CEO class they take in high school they discuss job titles and he is trying to find how to fit my square peg in their round holes.

The work I do today ticks a lot of boxes for me. We are a success in so far that we have built products that people love. Unfortunately, despite making an income that should be enough (but isn’t), from work that I could continue doing till my mind turns to mush, I made a decision a while back that the likelihood that I can continue is pretty low.

Last year I ran a research project, interviewing 15 different people, local and remote, to get a sense of job prospects, their methods of success, and how I might now fit in the grand scheme of things. The reason to do such a thing was I guessed I would soon need to become an employee, not an employer. I analysed and abstracted the results, which in turn gave me action items. But I didn’t take action because I was having a great time doing what I was doing.

I don’t care much for job titles, if you ask what I do, I just say I make products for kids. But many employers seem to care and computers that scan CV’s care.

Much of the work I do still involves design at some level, but I’m not a graphic designer, nor UX, nor a product designer (whatever that is). Nor am I podcast producer or audio engineer. I’m certainly not a CEO. None of these levels of abstraction seem to work with me; maybe I’ll just string together a bunch of words like they used to do years ago in startups like (but add product and UX for SEO): Dream (Product) Alchemist, (UX) Happiness Engineer or a title used years ago when I was at the Creativity Lab, Creative Disruptor.

Optimism

After our last set of restrictions from the CPHO I wrote a missive about what I had hoped to do to maintain my sanity midst the never ending deluge of negativity (and rage) that seems to accompany life on the Island of late.

With the exception of getting outside, I still am not a fan of winter, I’ve read a few books, exercised far more and have paid increasing attention to the food I eat.

I’ve also disconnected from most of social media, with the exception of Instagram, the Internets greatest source of unrealistic body image expectations.

Despite this I’ve found it increasingly difficult to maintain a positive attitude. I’m generally not what you would call a positive person on the best of days, but the current environment makes it hard to maintain my usual salty/not salty equilibrium. Let alone make the kind of change needed to transform myself to having a more positive outlook.

Peter linked to Charlie Angus On Getting from Darkness to the Light which helped for a moment.

I think all I can do is acknowledge the negativity, move on and keep achieving the goals set in front of me, and hope that the sun of Spring and Summer bring with it a greater sense of optimism.

Literacy

When you sit and wonder how so many people can believe what they do with regards to all matter of topics, but most importantly these days, public health, it’s important to first ponder the following statistic:

“For years, we have seen data that says 46 percent of Islanders struggle with the basic literacy required to work and thrive in our knowledge-based, digital society,” – source

“In 2003, it was estimated that 40,000 (nearly 43%) of PEI residents who were 16 to 65-years old had literacy levels below the desired level of coping (Statistics Canada, 2003, p.107)”

The problem doesn’t seem to be improving.

Now couple this with the algorithms behind social media platforms manipulating people with disinformation and we can come to a possible understanding of why we are where we are.

Workplace fashion

I haven’t had to dress well for work in over 20 years, with smart casual being as fancy as ever needed. Mostly my uniform of choice has been jeans and a t-shirt, maybe leather shoes if necessary. But a combination of working alone and the pandemic has created a whole new level of comfort. Sweat pants, comfy sandals and running socks are now the norm for me. I get some looks from other olds like myself when I’m shopping for groceries, but I could care less. This habit is here to stay.

A quick change

I wrote this missive on our company Instagram account, replete with the required photo:

January has been my least favorite month for as long as I can remember, and my view on winter in general has always been that it’s best experienced from the inside of a warm home or on a tropical beach.

Further restrictions by the CPHO this month has meant my plans to increase indoor fitness activities have been put on hold, and daily trips for coffee cancelled.

To keep healthy mentally and physically I plan on:

❄️ getting outside as much as I can bear – including running on trails,
❄️ reading more,
❄️ have an increased focus on sound nutrition,
❄️ and follow along with the excellent coaching from @782fitness for daily workouts

I might also spend a bit more time working than I should.

The goal is to continue pushing forward despite all the roadblocks put in our way.

Sometimes a change in perspective, attitude, or direction takes ages to occur. This time for me it took a short afternoon nap. When I woke I decided to stop letting external events affect me to the degree they had been, and treat them as simply another challenge to be overcome.

Study harder

“Keep this thought at the ready at daybreak, and through the day and night—there is only one path to happiness, and that is in giving up all outside of your sphere of choice, regarding nothing else as your possession, surrendering all else to God and Fortune.”
EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES , 4.4.39

I told Sheryl the other day that I have been studying some of the wisdom of the stoics. Nothing serious, just some choice quotes and explanations.

This was at a time when after shovelling out all the walkways, so people could exit the building after the storm, (the people responsible never wake before noon, and take a couple days to get started) and shovelling and salting our parking spot clean, someone had the rudeness to take our parking spot. They came out later and moved the car without a hint of care.

This precipitated a boomer-like rant about selfish-individualism and the lack of empathy in people, laziness, and on and on.

We both agreed that perhaps more study was needed. My son simply stated that I needed to chill. He’s not wrong.

Emotions

I felt a range of emotions yesterday as I listened to the news reports announcing new restrictions on what we are allowed to do. I had arrived at another gym, which I just joined for the winter in an effort to not only keep mentally and physically healthy but prepare for some competitions in the summer and fall, while I am still able.

Like many I am tired, and like some I am angry. I have no more patience.

When this all started two years ago, it was perplexing as to how people refused to wear masks or wash their hands or follow common sense health guidance. When the vaccine came, it was mesmerizing how people had collective amnesia with regards to the litany of shots they already have HAD to receive. I realized that most don’t have our frame of reference, having lived through SARS and various other outbreaks in a society that respects health professionals and trusts government. These measures and more feel normal to us. We have improved.

Being a small place surrounded by water with restricted points of entry we seemed to do well. Round-abouts were built, hockey rinks announced, pay raises for government were approved, and most importantly few got sick. Like before, you still needed to wait 6 months to get an ingrown toe nail clipped, and years to see a paediatric specialist. Life was as it was but with the added regime of limiting your contacts or booking your time in a gym (travel was somewhat a no no).

I assumed that like health care professionals, and many others, surely the government has been working to exhaustion to prepare for an outbreak, right?

That assumption has proven to be patently false.

It’s not a question of money, it’s a question of priorities and competence. My son today cannot attend school, cannot train in the pool, and cannot go to his CrossFit gym. But he is free to add more shifts at his service job. He is safe while increasing the profits for corporate but not while preparing himself for the future? Not a good look.

I see no strategy or long term plan, only tactics. If there is one, it isn’t being communicated which is in itself another failure.

A crisis is a sure test of leadership for which this provinces leadership is failing. Now I turn this angst to something productive, the one thing we can do, work, at least until election time, when I hope to devote myself to making sure these people don’t continue to serve.

Getting more sleep

I don’t always sleep well and despite for years expending effort on other areas of my mental and physical health it has remained a problem.

Lately the problem has been compounded by frequent nightly visits to the toilet, which I find incredibly annoying but have come to accept as it’s largely out of my control. A recent blood test has shown no cause for concern. To help, I resist my night time love of fruit and limit my night time fluid intake.

I’ve tried intense exercise, relaxation techniques, stretching, listening to music, reading and other activities in an effort to improve my sleep, nothing has shown consistent results. What has been working is simply forcing myself to stay in bed longer, to not adhere to a set schedule. The kids are old enough to take care of themselves and I have the luxury of setting my own work schedule. This hasn’t meant sleeping in until noon unfortunately, that’s a talent I lost when I stopped being a teenager, but it has meant that when I wake up at 3 or 4am alert and ready to start my day, I force myself to lay there for an hour. Eventually I fall back to sleep until sometime between 6 – 7am, which is sleeping in for me.

We introduce visualization techniques to kids on one of our podcasts and I have found that useful as well. If during one of my frequent trips to the bathroom I find my mind focusing on thoughts of the upcoming day, I switch my thinking to a calm and relaxing place, an imaginary place for me. That place lately has been a small room full of books, with a fire place, and a comfortable leather chair.

It’s been working most nights.

Disabling Focus Mode Syncing

Apples Focus mode is useful if not overcomplicated feature which I use frequently. I find it useful when I am working to set do not disturb on my Mac so that I can respond to messages and notifications when I feel it’s appropriate. And at night so that annoying email messages are not coming through on my phone. Unfortunately, “Share Across Devices” located in Settings > Focus is enabled by default, which has meant numerous missed calls on my phone (our doorbell rings my phone so that I can speak to whoever is at the door, usually a courier).

To stop this syncing

Open the Settings app
Just above Screen Time, tap Focus
“Share Across Devices” — tap the toggle to turn it off

Spot on

I have been at the office subsisting on Maxwell house instant coffee of late so it was an absolute treat to enjoy a cup of pour over at The Shed this morning. Having a cup of coffee where you can not only smell but taste the overtones is a brilliant (re)start to the day. There are a number of places in town to have an ok tasting expresso but no place I have been dedicates itself solely to great tasting coffee. We are so lucky to have her.

Salty

My son read my Twitter posts recently and he and his girlfriend let me know that I seem salty all the time. This comes on the heals of being told that I seem too serious and don’t smile enough.

The Twitter that I am subject to is full of vitriol, virtue signalling, and an endless stream of all that is wrong with the world. With the exception of virtue signalling (many local companies/orgs. with social media chops pat themselves on the back endlessly), I thought I fit in.

I take their comments to heart and hope to share the brighter side of me, if I can find it. Except for here, where I will continue to crank.

Likely the best thing I can do for my mental health is simply delete all my social media – even Instagram, where I am flooded with videos of rich food and extremely fit people, a weird dichotomy which helps create unrealistic expectations.

I can’t delete Twitter entirely unfortunately, but like Facebook before, I’ll just stop showing up and be all the happier as a result.

Not a resolution

I’ve long felt that New Years resolutions were nonsense and more a way to make yourself feel bad about what you didn’t accomplish than setting achievable goals.

On New Years Day Sheryl shared what we did on that day four years ago. We ran a race together sponsored by ChaTime (the same chain in Charlottetown), then went to see a movie at Big City, followed by Cheesecake and Latté’s at Ink, our favorite café at that time.

5 years ago I ran the Xiamen Marathon and spent New Years Eve alone in a hotel bar.

I enjoy how Facebook, Apple photos and DayOne give us a chance to remember or relive the past. It’s a valuable feature for me but it’s becoming evident that we spend too much time reminiscing, and not enough time creating new memories. Granted there is much more to do in a place like Hsinchu than say Charlottetown, the Island is a sleepy place, not a bustling Asian city surrounded by mountains and beaches. We led a full life before returning home, and now with the exception of our first year here, our default seems to do more work, which includes my son, who has a part time job, is on the swim team, and is part of our CrossFit crew.

We don’t expend enough effort trying to find something to do together, no matter how simple the activity may be.

My daughter is starting to get it. Unlike other local youth her age she has no interest in bars and drinking, or house parties and such. On New Years Eve she said she was going to go out with friends for a drive to the beach and later sit and talk at the park. At the time I thought it rather odd, but later realized this is exactly the kind of activity that is possible here, the kind of activity that helps build new memorable experiences.

On the podcast Stay Tuned with Preet, Scott Galloway talked about how he takes the month of August off and travels with his family to Europe. Now, he’s rich, and I’m most certainly not, but Sheryl and I used to do the same. One year we spent the summer traveling Europe, many summers afterwards we would spend time on a Canoe Cove beach. Scott talks about how he will never regret taking time away from work to spend with his family – a common refrain from anyone with the ability to do so and a modicum of foresight.

I have little to report about the past year. This is in part due to COVID (and Canada’s lack of a coordinated response), but we really could have done more. Much more.

I’m not going to call this a resolution as that’s just framing for failure, but I will commit to spend more time in 2022 creating more memories with family and outside of work.